LIVE-IN HOUSE HELPS (SmoothLife *Clinic* Oct. 24)
Today on SMOOTHLIFE with OLAKUNLE SORIYAN, the focus is always on the FAMILY and my critical concern underscores the needful thought for everyone in authority in the family front. For a very long time, families have continued to hire live-in house helps. Many have suffered terribly for that choice. A larger number have suffered but are not aware of their suffering because the issues were never reported; and very few significant others have been lucky not to experience the very lethal and common yet underrated issues. However, the challenges of contemporary times are revealing a completely new perspective to the live-in house help reality.
A few years ago, I did a wide and robust research on the relevance of domestic house helps in the home. The findings from this research instructed me to create a coaching system where I invest SIX HOURS WITH COUPLES, TEACHING and DESIGNING for them a HOME MANAGEMENT LIFESTYLE WITHOUT the INVOLVEMENT of a LIVE-IN HOUSE HELP. The testimonies of couples have been amazing for want of a better word. Part of what I found out in the research is the fact that the socio-economic and political landscape is drawing people’s threshold to the limit. It is forcing people to embrace their need to survive at the expense of their need to reach out to their highest meaning and fulfillment. Now, the socio economic imbalance has pushed domestic house helps to an inhuman state of desperation such that the ability to recognize meaning and honest service is lost; and that which is required to recognize comfort and material strength through inhuman actions is becoming more and more amplified. The truth is, house helps are becoming more and more aware of their power and potential to do and undo in the home and justifiably so. I mean the house help can withdraw life from you at anytime and cause untold hardship for every member of the family at the speed of his or her wish. For example, A house help, if provoked to a level of pain or hurt his emotion cannot interpret or handle, can poison the stew or water in the house tonight and everybody dies tomorrow morning. She can abuse your infant child sexually and in many other ways without your knowledge. Actually, they are powerful, in fact very powerful. And while couples or family members overrate the power they have over the house help, they also underrate how powerful the house helps really are.
No matter how much love you show the house help or how much hate you display, the power to do and undo remains resident in his/her hands to use as he/she considers necessary. The question then is, do you want to continue to endure the torture of knowing that much power resides in the hands of a stranger in your house, and do you want to continue to live in denial of the fact that a potential danger resides in your environment 247? Please don’t get me wrong, I am not saying we shouldn’t have house helps, instead, I am suggesting that it should be managed under a defined structure. My goal today however, is to bring you to a state of consciousness of the issues as they really are. Next week, I will be going deeper with practical and useful thoughts and also put in perspective the defined structure in which this issue should be put. Never forget, the society we desire can only be created through our commitment to create balance and meaning for everyone regardless of status. If we ignore this, our society fails and culture rottens. This is the Life. We can connect from here. Go!