Refocusing your Paradigm—Moments are not Perfect; they are what you make them…
I write today to that young person out there and the adults who interact with them; and the critical idea is not to talk about all that the government has failed to deliver, but to instead focus on the wrong thinking well seated in the heads of young people and denying them the mental and inner balance required for them to participate in the complex work of nation-building as critical stakeholders. I see many things young people sincerely but stupidly do and sustain on a daily basis that steal their focus, drive and happiness. These things need to be known and understood; and I will describe three common but vital ones with the hope that once you know what they are and how they operate, you can easily spot them in your own life or in the life of those you help or mentor within your area of influence.
The very first one is focusing on everyone’s story except your own. Some people are name droppers, and they never have a name. Some are just achievement singers, and they never personally achieve anything. I appreciate it when people come to me to say how much of impact I make in their lives and how much inspiration I am to them. But I am one quick to remind them not to be so satisfied with the success stories of others and how things have gone for them that they forget to write their own stories. Everyone has a story. It is the free blessing of life through existence.
Each of us must accept the idea that if you live this life well, face the challenges inherent in it with courage, humility, knowledge and wisdom, the world will very soon invite you to share your story, particularly if you are optimistic that such days are a part of your destiny. You owe it to your existence and to your world to make the choice and the commitment to unfold your own tale and bring it to life. You have everything you need to become what you are capable of becoming. Incredible change happens when you decide to take control.
The responsibility today is a simple commitment to refusing to let others do your thinking, talking, and deciding for you. It means submitting to critical guidance through mentorship with a singular commitment to creating a platform for learning to respect and use your own ideas and instincts to write your passage. Keep your best wishes and your biggest goals close only to your heart and to the heart and heads of the mentors and counselors of your life. Dedicate time to your focus and the stories it generates every day. Start running. Package your story; it’s news. Talk about the stories of others only to the extent that it inspires you to run towards your own or it inspires others to run towards theirs. If you tell stories only because they make sense and your tales aren’t driving change, then that’s gossip. Gossip is information you cannot use. You can gossip alone by that definition. Anytime you associate with or peddle information you cannot use to drive positive change and progress, you are in an act of gossip. And that can happen if you read materials that are driving you to materialism and remind you of all the things you haven’t done and sucking your focus energy and feeding your distraction. The movies you see, the songs you listen to, the people you listen to—once the information you are receiving or the one you are giving is not creating positive momentum, it is an act of gossip. Even if no one knows, and you are the one-eyed king in your grossly ignorant domain, you will soon arrive at a discerning community of strong minds with empires in their brains, who will expose the smallness of your character.
The next thought is the mindset that empowers you to keep waiting for the perfect moments in your endeavours. Most young people allow their journey of life to be pressed down with the idea that a perfect moment exist. Moments are not perfect; they’re what you make them—the perfect moment, the perfect opportunity, the perfect state of being, etc. Wake up! These states of perfection are myths. They do not exist. Your ability to grow to your highest potential is directly related to your willingness to act in the face of imperfections. You will come to succeed not by finding a perfect moment, but by learning to see and use life’s imperfections perfectly.
The third one is priceless. You owe it to yourself to refuse to allow a salary or business profit defines your inner and outer roles. The work that defines monetary reward as its greatest inspiration is nothing but imprisonment. Even if you aren’t super-passionate about your work, you’ve got to at least be interested in it. When you design a lifestyle in which your work is something you suffer through daily, strictly to pay your bills, you end up spending your entire life wishing you had someone else’s job. Think about it. This is your life; your work will fill a large percentage of it. It’s about you.
Do you know you spend close to 18hrs daily between night sleep, waking up, getting ready for work, going to work, and returning? 18hrs? Do the maths! 18 out of 24 is a full life. If you hate your work and you hate your bedroom, you have a miserable life right there. And please ignore the wisdom that says, “Don’t let your work define you.” It’s pure and confident ignorance, that’s all. “I will do work that defines me.” Your daily work should define you. When the essence of who you are defines at least some slice of the work you do for a living, that work generates fulfillment. The idea is that interest in your work puts quality in your output and happiness in your mind. Only time defends the veracity of this kind of thoughts.
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